time is running very2 fast these days

tak sampai 90 hari pn lg...

and nothing seems completed YET!!!

bila nak rasa bersemangat ni???maybe dah tak semangat semenjak dr dl lg gaknya, sbb tu jd cmni...huhu

alhamdulillah

sempat jugak hantar tesis sem ni....mmg confirm meroyan la kalau extend lg 1 sem...dah penat dah. alhamdulillah, hantar gak akhirnya. syukur sgt2.

wise decision

not really sure whether it is wise, or plain dumb when both of us decided to take a risk by investing in something huge (involving big sum of money, of course). especially when we are not legally married yet, n when there is a possibility that it might not be materialized in the future. however, both of us are very determined person, with that kind of certainty implanted in our brain, and a risk-taker by nature, we both agreed to make a decision by ourself. heed for advise only after we made up our mind, others might feel that we are making a huge mistake by not asking for any 2nd opinion about this matter beforehand, but i do believe everything happens for a reason, and we should be prepared to make a decision by ourselves. soon, the decision is always between me and my partner. therefore, to make it less complicated for us and as both of us are pretty convinced with the proposal being shown to us, it is such a shame if we ever let it slipped. as for now, we feel that it is worth every ringgit spent. insyaAllah.

i've always told myself, being grown-ups is such a hassle. it is. different person sees it differently, and handle it differently as well, but as a person with full of doubts and a skeptic naturally, it is hard for me to make a decision, thats the reason for hating the fact that i'm growing up. hating it but still have to accept it.

but, with a little moral support from dearest partner for life, everything seem to be a lot easier. i know i'm not a wonder woman, i know i cant do it all, n i do know that i need someone to tell me and guide me. this is the part where i need Him and him, definitely.

we made a decision, we live by it.
we just have to make sure we are ready to face the consequences.
come what may.

it's not such a secret anymore

bila org ckp, diorang tau psl aku melalui blog
bila org ckp, diorang heard bout new news from me is through this blog, too

therefore, it is not such a secret anymore...
my blog, my so-called secret life, my neverending whining series of frustration and depression

tak rasa feymes pn, jgn risau...
tak rasa nak delete blog pn, jgn risau...

tu je nk bgtau

hehe

pening dah

tukar2 layout, tah nape sume nak ke kanan je, kne setting smla la jwbnye...anyway, bila tgk ticker tu...haih, byk mngeluh jela jwbnye skrg ni...pening kepala...abg sy ckp, org perempuan ni otaknya lebih berat dr org lelaki, and has a bigger corpus collosum (the bit that connects the two halves). sebab tu kita org perempuan, byk sgt fikirnya. benda kecik2 pn boleh jd besar2...we are born that way rupenya...br tau.hehe


mls nak update cerita apa2. sy penat. sekian

tak mahu fikir susah2

aku nak buat kptsn yg paling drastik aku rse...klu cite kat org len mst dah duk geleng kepala je...even famili members pn tatau lg aku wat kptsn cmni...tp bila dah fikir pnjg, rse ini lah kptsn paling wajar buat mse skrg...


doakan saya ye...saya mahu rasa tenang dan gembira setiap hari...itu je

first day

semua pn nampak macam pelik je. environment baru gaknya. oh, saya jadi minah kilang sekarang ni. heh. no more student2 yang perlu diajar lepas ni. aku plak yg jadi student br skrg ni. kalau ada pun yg kne diajar, yang lagi tua usianya dan lain kewarganegaraannya. :p

never know what to expect in the future. never will know. but i'm praying hard it's going to be an easy one. few small stones wont hinder the movement and hopefully the path is going to be even smoother. insyaAllah.

dulu bila kerjanya cuma mengarah-arah student buat itu ini, rasa stresnya lain. sebok fikir nak cari kerja lain. yang gajinya diayar bulan2, dan bukannya ikut semester. sekarang bila kerjanya diarah itu ini, stresnya lain. nak sangat kan merasa kerja kat industri, haa amek. :p

aku bukan rasa susah kerjanya. bukan. tapi takut sebab aku tak pernah dilatih sebegitu. asalnya habis degree, terus2 sambung study, then diajak mengaja budak undergrad plak, mana pernah merasa susahnya kerja kilang. tapi dulu masa buat praktikal kat kilang besi tu boleh jugak la nak dapat sikit gambaran camane gayanye kerja kilang. lagi2 kilang industri yang berbau busuk, bising and tidak nampak menyelerakan pun. huhu.

ni taip semalam tp mls nk publish, biar simpan jadi draft je dulu. yang bwh ni hari ni punya luahan perasaan.

masuk2 kerja je dah kena join meeting. 1st day dah kena shake hand sama itu big boss. yang tuan punya kilang banyak2 tu la. second day meeting ngn boss kecik sket plak. hari2 pun meeting. hari2 pun kena jln kehulu kehilir check. verify. remind. heh.

ok, i shuldnt even complaining or whatsoever. tapi mungkin aku tak berapa bersemangat kot nak kerja kat sini. i know i should be grateful that at least i got a job, still in selangor gak even quite far away from the usual place that i called home for the lst 6 years.

mungkin juga rasa jauh dari itu incik tunang. sebab tu la sampai macam takde perasaan langsung pergi kerja pun. memang simply kosong. tah. benci tak. suka tak. zero feeling. huuuu. ada ke perasaan camtu eh?

i should be grateful, rite?
i am.
alhamdulillah. tapi aku tetap rasa kosong. harapnya tak lama la perasaan kosong ni bersarang dalam diri. insyaAllah.

aku jadi rindu pada mak abah. duduk tempat jauh dari family and tak kenal dengan orang sekeliling, buat aku jadi lonely. takut mostly. haih~~~

i hope it's going to be over soon.