Road Runners

aku ingin lari
seperti watak sufi dlm filem 'sepi'

tapi berlari tanpa arah dan tujuan
bukankah hanya meletihkan

berbaloikah pengorbanan dan penantian
kalau hanya untuk dikecewakan?

p/s npe tibe2 melankolik plak ni....ish3 ;D (n if i'm not mistaken, the shoes is called road runners)

Yesterday

080808

nice numbers, only comes once in a lifetime...were said to be the luckiest day for the chinese (n for most of the people who believe it)...however, that day were not the lucky date for some...a friend of mine lost her sister, yesterday early morning (not really sure the COD, but my friend's sister had been in a coma for about 3 months, if i'm not mistaken)...n i lost a friend just before the clock strikes twelve (just 'lost', not dead)

i'm not crying (i did, last night, for about 5 minutes, i guess)...but after that, it seems like everything went back to normal...as if nothing ever happens...i dunno, i guess i'm not really serious, not really care, not really sincere having that relationship at the first place...who knows it better other than Him, so i put everything in His hands...for quite some time i think about the decision that i made last night...as far as i know, everything that i ever promise about this special yet complicated friendship, i never take it seriously...not even once, i broke each and every little promises...n yet somehow, i never regret any of it...it has been a roller coaster journey, which had never been intended at the very beginning...but still, i try to put everything behind me...i know it will never come to a good end, neither do i know that it will going to be this bad...having said all that, i'm wishing for his well-being n happiness from afar

and as a servant to His Almighty, all i can do is seeking His forgiveness n praying for all the great things in life to come...not only for me, but for others as well...

"WHEREVER YOU GO AND FIND DARKNESS IN YOUR LIFE, WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO IS TO LIGHT THE LAMP WITHIN YOURSELF"

"Lessons Learned" by Carrie Underwood

There's some things that I regret,
Some words I wish had gone unsaid,
Some starts,
That had some bitter endings,
Been some bad times I've been through,
Damage I cannot undo,
Some things,
I wish I could do all all over again,
But it don't really matter,
Life gets that much harder,
It makes you that much stronger,
Oh, some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were,
Lessons learned.

[Chorus:]
And every tear that had to fall from my eyes,
Everyday I wondered how I'd get through the night,
Every change, life has thrown me,
I'm thankful, for every break in my heart,
I'm grateful, for every scar,
Some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were lessons learned.

There's mistakes that I have made,
Some chances I just threw away,
Some roads,
I never should've taken,
Been some signs I didn't see,
Hearts that I hurt needlessly,
Some wounds,
That I wish I could have one more chance to mend,
But it don't make no difference,
The past can't be rewritten,
You get the life you're given,
Oh, some pages turned,
Some bridges burned,
But there were,
Lessons learned.

And all the things that break you,
Are all the things that make you strong,
You can't change the past,
Cause it's gone,
And you just gotta move on,
Because it's all,
Lessons learned.

p/s am i learning my lessons yet? only He knows

Behind Closed Door

when one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us

Biar Menjadi Kenangan

Aku dan kamu takkan tahu
Mengapa kita tak berpisah
Walau kita takkan pernah satu

p/s found this lyric when browsing thru my sis's laptop...relate to anyone?? of course, if not what's the point of posting it in my blog, rite??

~Kabur~

Perasaan itu hadir lagi
Mengisi segenap ruang hatiku
Tak lama dahulu
Kubiar ia bersarang jauh di sudut hatiku
Agar tak lagi ku temuinya
Namun ia kembali
Biar berat hati ini menerima kenyataan
Namun
Ku gagahi diriku melangkah
Biar kabus mengelilingiku
Mengaburi penglihatan

Heard a tragic story last week, tp br b'kesempatan nk write bout it today...beyond my expectation n beyond my consciousness level...it's mental...no need to tell what it is...hanya akan melukakan hati yg mengetahui...btw, it's not about me, nevertheless i feel sorry for her...

n i found this sad love quotes...which i felt very, very close to me...tp, mybe this time i wanna dedicate this to 'her'...be strong my fren, as my sis used to tell me "big girls dun cry"!!!

I keep telling myself that I don't miss you,
and that I don't love you,
hoping someday I'll believe it.

Love is letting go,
even when you don't want to.
Love is letting him be happy
even when it doesn't involve you.
Love is being okay with just being friends
Love is being able to say goodbye
because you know its the best thing for him
Love is letting go

Letting go of someone dear to you is hard,
but holding on to someone who doesn't
even feel the same is much harder.
Giving up doesn't mean you are weak!
It only means that you are strong enough to let go!

We are the perfect couple,
we're just not in the perfect situation.

True love leaves a memory no one can steal
and a heartache no one can heal

Its hard to pretend you love someone when
you don't but its harder to pretend that
you don't love someone when you really do.

I believe it will get better in time

It's been the longest winter without you
I didn't know where to turn to
See somehow I can't forget you
After all that we've been through

Going coming thought I heard a knock
Who's there no one
Thinking that I deserve it
Now I realize that I really didn't know
If you didn't notice you mean everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gonna be ok

[ Chorus: ]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

I couldn't turn on the TV
Without something there to remind me
Was it all that easy
To just put aside your feelings

If I'm dreaming don't wanna laugh
Hurt my feelings but that's the path
I believe in
And I know that time will heal it
If you didn't notice boy
you meant everything
Quickly I'm learning to love again
All I know is I'm gonna be ok

[ Chorus: ]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

Since there's no more you and me
It's time I let you go
So I can be free
And live my life how it should be
No matter how hard it is I'll
be fine without you
Yes I will

[ Chorus: ]
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time
Thought I couldn't live without you
It's gonna hurt when it heals too
It'll all get better in time
And even though I really love you
I'm gonna smile cause I deserve to
It'll all get better in time

Dunno why, tp since Leona Lewis makes an appearance...ak slalu dpt rse yg lagu2 dia byk relate dgn pe yg jd pd diri ak skrg ni...klu mse first time dia kuar ngn single 'Bleeding Love' yg meletup around de world tu...i told myself, i'm gonna stick to that song, permanently...coz it seems like i don't even care what others think bout what i do (yes, i'm stubborn, n very selfish+self-centered)...if it makes me happy, i'll juz continue doing whatever i think is rite...even though it's the worst decision i ever did to myself...tp skrg ak rse i'll stick to 'Better in Time'...coz i think it really fits me well (mmm...life IS absurd, it's hard to even make a 'RIGHT' choice)...but, how do u know u're making the rite choice when there is so much possibilities in the outcome...mmm, what the hell am i rambling here...walau bagaimana pun, i'm positive...juz like a dear fren of mine told me last night..."erina, be positif...klu ko rse mslh ko bsr, de org yg de mslh lg bsr drpd ko...juz byk b'sbr n stop crying...ak akan slalu de utk temankn ko"....mmm, i find his words soothing n comforting...n rite before ak tdo mlm td, ak t'tnye2 adakah slame ni ak t'lalu taksub m'cari sesuatu yg ak sndr xtau pe...sdgkn pe yg ak cari tu de dkt je dgn ak sbnrnye (like, rite in front of my eyes), t'lmpau dkt smpi ak sndr x sdr akan kehadiran dia...mmm, tah la...life is full of adventures n mysteries yg smpi ble2 pn x akan de kesudahannye...unless we die, i think so...kat sini, ak attach lirik both 'Better in Time' n 'Bleeding Love'...juz to remind me what really happens...mybe i need a counseling.hehe

But something happened
For the very first time with you
My heart melts into the ground
Found something true
And everyone's looking round
Thinking I'm going crazy

But I don't care what they say
I'm in love with you
They try to pull me away (dis is really, really true, 'they' really did try to pull me away)
But they don't know the truth
My heart's crippled by the vein
That I keep on closing
You cut me open and I

Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
I keep bleeding
I keep, keep bleeding love
Keep bleeding
Keep, keep bleeding love
You cut me open

Trying hard not to hear
But they talk so loud
Their piercing sounds fill my ears
Try to fill me with doubt
Yet I know that the goal
Is to keep me from falling (obviously!!)

But nothing's greater
Than the rush that comes with your embrace
And in this world of loneliness
I see your face (ckp mcm ni bila u're madly in love...mmm)
Yet everyone around me
Thinks that I'm going crazy, maybe, maybe (maybe, it is true after all)

SOULMATE

Believe in soulmate (or soul mate)??
Now that's something to talk about...
There are theories behind it (either from Aristophanes in Plato's Symposium or theories popularized by Theosophy and in a modified form by Edgar Cayce)...
Walau apa jua teori yang dikemukakan...semuanya terpulang pada setiap individu untuk memahami dan mentafsirkannya

p/s: entry ini tiada kaitan di antara yang masih hidup atau yang telah meninggal dunia ;)...i juz lurve the song.that's it...