please spare a thought for me

needless to say...sometimes u have to be selfish and cruel and mean to the one u love just to grab their attention...just to get that glimpse of affection in a sense to acknowledge the relationship even exists...being a woman who likes her man to take charge without mis-using his power, i like to be told what to do rather than to decide my own action (or maybe i'm just too lazy to even think about making decisions)





it is not that i love being the non-dominant partner in a relationship coz i do being the dominant partner if i want something and i'll have it my way either he likes it or not but i love the fact that someone can guide me, lead me to to the things that really matters in a relationship, coz i'm not a natural-born leader...no, i dont think i have that kind of trait in my genes...and most probably, i just love to laid back and be worry-less by not sweating myself to make decisions. i just hate that. making decisions, i mean. the laid back thing is a feel good feeling.





yes, we both have difficulties in adjusting. we both are not basically in loving moments all the time (if loving means no quarrels, getting yourself emotionally hurt and annoyed with each other)...coz we both do quarrels alot, even some of my friends seem suprised to know that we went through rough patches even in our first year together, coz USUALLY it is not like that, coz first year means honeymoon time, dating time, we should be lovey dovey and such but we are not that typical couple, i guess...but it doesnt mean that we dont love each other...it is just the way we show our love, through quarrels...





we learn so much about each other through all those sad, teary moments...those bickering days brings us closer than ever...those neverending disagreement and arguing only happen coz we simply cant be bothered to talk things nicely...we just love to make things seems over the top...even the smallest pin-hole matter will turn into a crack that will lead to a disastrous catastrophe (see, guna perkataan pun nak over)


but as a humble human being, i'm only praying for the best of things to happen. i'm not asking much, just enough to make us stronger, getting ourself through this emotional ordeal safely and finally getting our sanity back into thinking the things that really matters...which is love. coz i just love this tall, dark and handsome guy to be right by my side through my lonely days, bringing the smile back to my face and be happily walk beside me, telling me all those lame jokes. and i love his smiles, and i hope one day, if i'm being blessed to get my tummy bulging with our child, i want the child to have the daddy's smiles.

p/s he's not that TALL, not that DARK, neither he is not that HANDSOME...but, he is my version of a TDH guy...so as people told me ;p