conversation seriously.
i dont have a specific place in mind when i agreed to meet him that day. and it wasnt like a plan or anything. and i suggest this place coz the previous week i was driving all by myself to this place hoping to gain back my strength (i hope) and some senses.
when he asked "where should we meet?" and i can only suggest this particular place.
i can still remember what he wore on that very day, but i can only remember few things bout my attire that day (i pay too much attention to others than to myself??what??). he wore his red MU jersey with jeans and his sandals (which ends up t'cabut on that day, but still wearable lagi sampai sekarang sbb dah anta jahit and i still love seeing him wearing it) and he brings along a bottle of Coke (he dont remember bout this one,hehe). what i can remember bout myself, i wore a black shirt with jeans,and the most memorable stuff is the yellow bag (i love it so much tapi dah teruk sangat keadaannya, so kena buang jugak at last...wuwu) but i cant remember tudung apa, and sandal apa...anyway, which only brings smile to my face when i heard this song:
i remember what you wore on our first day
u came into my life and i thought hey
u know this could be something
masa mula2 dia ajak jumpa tu, tak rasa apa pun. but, trying to make a good impression, i tried to be there early. and somehow i feel anxious and nervous as well bila dah sampai. we have never been friends. i mean, real good friends. we say hi, and thats just about it, we never had any serious conversation before. but he already had an intention of talking to me bout his relationship at that time (i ask him "why me?" n he said "i dunno"). and as a good listener i am, i'm just trying to help out (by lending my ears of course, little did i know what was coming for both of us in the future). he already told me that he would be late coz it took him around 40-45 mins to be at our meeting place. ada la few incident happen sementara tunggu dia sampai, creepy gak tapi tak payah la cerita. and dia plak leh tak tau laman bunga raya tu kat mana, and end up aku plak kena gi jemput dia kat depan masjid putrajaya. anyway, tu tak penting.
bila dah jumpa tu, we start talking bout small matters first and i found it awkward initially (surprisingly, he didnt felt that way)...dia selamba je. cover kot.hehe...and from there dia start cerita hal2 serius, hal2 yang buat dia kecewa. waktu tu memang confirm la aku duk jadi pembimbing rakan sebaya yang berjaya (info: ktorg b'dua PRS kt skola). bagi nasihat baik punya, sedangkan diri sendiri pun banyak masalah gak...haha, tapi kitorang exchange stories gak la...we both were in a difficult situation at that time, so basically i found him as my confidante, as crying shoulders mungkin eventhough aku takde la menangis kat bahu dia, literally.
i'm actually suprised by his different personality when we met. i've known him for someone else previously and that images was hard to be erased, but he made me changed my mind. he is for who he is. but i see it differently coz i never knew him before. and i never knew that i can fall in love with him.
that is the starting point of our life together. the turning point. at that time i juz want to gave up a relationship that is so incredible yet so impossible to happen for a relationship that gives me an ease of mind and insyaAllah gives me lots of new perspective to look at. it took me quite some time to accept him (eventhough it is not actually) coz i've been in a complicated relationship previously and i really have to build trust and confident for him first before trying to accept him for who he is and not trying to make any comparison or being judgemental for no particular reason or trying to change him into someone else.
lepas mencapai kata sepakat kitorang pun berjanji untuk membahagiakan satu sama lain, memberikan apa yang termampu untuk menjadikan hubungan yang sedia ada tetap kekal. aku pasti jodoh,maut Allah dah tentukan. tapi aku harap dialah jodoh aku. untuk hari ini dan seterusnya. hingga hujung nyawa (ecece...macam movie yusri dgn erra plak...haha).
kami dah janji. kami kena tepati.
sayang itu bukan untuk kelmarin, semalam atau hari ini sahaja. tapi untuk selamanya.
janji tau. (pinky promise)
:)
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